Shopping for a Nursing Home

During breakfast today, I read about Ebola, the disasters in Israel and the Ukraine, and a shootout in Greenwich Village two blocks from my home so opened the Science section of the paper, looking for good news only to find Jane Brody urging us to shop for a nursing home. For me shopping – whether picking up pesticide-free blueberries at the Farmers Market or ordering Spanx online – is a diversion, bordering on a hobby. It’s not exactly “retail therapy” since I go for the discounts, caring more about what I save than what I buy. I’m not aware of anyone getting a good deal on a nursing home so it doesn’t interest me. If I become a burden, I trust my son will have seen the commercial, “A Home for Mom.” Brody quotes someone saying, “The biggest mistake people make is waiting until the last minute, when faced with a crisis, to find a suitable facility.” I would argue that some cosmetic surgeries and the country having elected George W. Bush could be bigger mistakes.

It’s possible to die without having a lingering condition that requires being institutionalized. Death, on the other hand, is harder to avoid, and I’m prepared. My exit strategy is exciting — an urn with family photos embedded in a beautiful mosaic design that was crafted with our own plates. If you share my reluctance to research nursing homes, go for a shopping spree on my web site, and consider commissioning me to celebrate your life on an urn.